The Female always makes the Rules.
The Rules are subject to change at any time without prior notice.
No Male can possibly know all the Rules.
If the Female suspects that the Male knows all the Rules she must immediately change some or all of the Rules.
The Female is never wrong.
If the Female is wrong it is due to a misunderstanding which was the direct result of something the Male said or did which was wrong.
The Male must always apologise immediately for causing said misunderstanding.
The Male is always wrong.
The Male may be right if he agrees with the Female unless she wants him to disagree.
The Female may change her mind at any time.
The Male may never change his mind without the express written consent of the Female.
The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
The Male must remain calm at all times unless the Female wants him to be angry and/or upset.
The Female must under no circumstances let the Male know whether she wants him to be angry and/or upset.
The Male is expected to mind read at all times.
If the Female has PMT all the Rules are null and void
The Female is ready when she is ready.
The Male must be ready at all times.
Re: tonights rules
Re: tonights rules
Reminded me of this one:
Last month, National University of Lesotho scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer.
Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer contains female hormones (hops contain phytoestrogens) and that by drinking enough beer, men turn into women.
To test the theory, 100 men drank 8 pints of beer each within a 1 hour period. It was then observed that 100% of the test subjects:
1. Argued over nothing.
2. Refused to apologise when obviously wrong.
3. Gained weight.
4. Talked excessively without making sense.
5. Became overly emotional.
6. Couldn't drive.
7. Failed to think rationally.
8. Had to sit down while urinating.
No further testing was considered necessary.