cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

The good old days

Highlighted
Community Veteran
Posts: 1,887
Thanks: 5
Registered: ‎05-04-2007

Re: The good old days

Everyone has probably seen this before, but seeing as there has been no female response, maybe this would invoke it  Cheesy
Mens Rules for Women
Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us whining about you leaving it down.
Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.
Saturday = Sports
Crying is blackmail.
Ask for what you want. Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
We don't remember dates. Mark them on a calendar and remind us frequently.
Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
Check your oil! Please.
Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact all comments become null and void after 7 days.
If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to answer that question anymore.
If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
Let us look. It doesn't hurt anyone, to look. And for us, its genetic.
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.
ALL men see in only 16 colours. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. We have no idea what mauve is.
We are not mind readers and we never will be.
If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will believe you.
When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.
You have enough clothes.
You have too many shoes.
It is neither in your best interest or ours to take any quiz together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.
BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.
Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mind that, it's like camping.

/divorce
Highlighted
Community Veteran
Posts: 38,460
Thanks: 1,033
Fixes: 62
Registered: ‎15-06-2007

Re: The good old days

And this was presented to a young lady in on her marriage in 1891 by the Girls Friendly Society
Highlighted
Grafter
Posts: 265
Registered: ‎16-11-2007

Re: The good old days

okay... lady here...
what a sad bunch... life is for sharing..... anyway ... womens lib has kicked in since the " THE GOOD OLD DAYS"    Roll_eyes
Highlighted
Community Veteran
Posts: 7,397
Thanks: 101
Fixes: 2
Registered: ‎30-08-2007

Re: The good old days

Quote from: Oldjim
And this was presented to a young lady in on her marriage in 1891 by the Girls Friendly Society

I assume in this context, the Lord mentioned in the last line is; the lord and master...her husband!!
Experience; is something you gain, just after you needed it most.

When faced with two choices, simply toss a coin. It works not because it settles the question for you. But because in that brief moment while the coin is in the air. You suddenly know what you are hoping for.
Highlighted
Community Veteran
Posts: 1,699
Registered: ‎30-07-2007

Re: The good old days

I almost hesitate to join this thread.  It's certainly living close to the edge, however I remember reading once, something like:
"Women marry thinking their husbands will change, that's their tragedy
Men marry thinking their wives never will, that's theirs"  Wink
John
Highlighted
Community Veteran
Posts: 38,460
Thanks: 1,033
Fixes: 62
Registered: ‎15-06-2007

Re: The good old days

Sorry - it has a capital L so it doesn't mean the husband who is only entitled to a small h - which, as the ladies on the forum will tell you, is only fair and just. And no I am not going to take this further or I will be banned.  Crazy
Highlighted
Community Veteran
Posts: 7,397
Thanks: 101
Fixes: 2
Registered: ‎30-08-2007

Re: The good old days

Quote from: firefly2
okay... lady here...
what a sad bunch... life is for sharing..... anyway ... womens lib has kicked in since the " THE GOOD OLD DAYS"    Roll_eyes

Surely, thats a contradiction in terms...?
(sorry for the full quote, but it is a small one)
Experience; is something you gain, just after you needed it most.

When faced with two choices, simply toss a coin. It works not because it settles the question for you. But because in that brief moment while the coin is in the air. You suddenly know what you are hoping for.
Highlighted
Community Veteran
Posts: 38,460
Thanks: 1,033
Fixes: 62
Registered: ‎15-06-2007

Re: The good old days

How about the old saw - what yours is ours and what's mine is mine - runs and hides
Highlighted
Grafter
Posts: 241
Registered: ‎06-04-2008

Re: The good old days

Quote from: firefly2
womens lib has kicked in since the " THE GOOD OLD DAYS"    Roll_eyes

Sadly, very true.  And don't we know it.  Cheesy
Highlighted
Grafter
Posts: 265
Registered: ‎16-11-2007

Re: The good old days

to Javert... you know that you couldn't live without us... who is going to mop your brow when you have a cold ????
@ petlew.. " the good old days was just a quote... probably happier then tho'  satisfied with less... Undecided Smiley
Highlighted
Grafter
Posts: 241
Registered: ‎06-04-2008

Re: The good old days

Quote from: firefly2
to Javert... you know that you couldn't live without us... who is going to mop your brow when you have a cold ????

firefly2:
"who is going to mop your brow when you have a cold?"
1.  I never have a cold - only "man flu".
2.  Who is going to mop my brow?  No-one.  As "Bachelor of this Parish" I have to get on with it - and leave my fevered brow unmopped - unless, of course, you're volunteering?  Wink
3.  A Big Plus - I don't get nagged if I leave the seat up.
John  Grin


Highlighted
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 23,863
Thanks: 4,171
Fixes: 1,070
Registered: ‎11-01-2008

Re: The good old days

Quote from: rogerloxton

Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mind that, it's like camping.

It's not much like camping, but as the PS3 is in the same room sometimes been told to kip on the sofa is to be welcomed  Smiley
Customer / Moderator
If it helped click the thumb
If it fixed it click 'This fixed my problem'
Highlighted
Grafter
Posts: 265
Registered: ‎16-11-2007

Re: The good old days

oh, how you gentlemen love to mock the poor defensive women in your lives.
hi javert,
am so sorry but have to decline the invitation... i have served my time. [ she says laughing] Roll_eyes
Highlighted
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 29,610
Thanks: 3,067
Fixes: 458
Registered: ‎14-04-2007

Re: The good old days

*Strat keeps his head down...there might be another Open Day Lips_are_sealed

Customer and Forum Moderator. Windows 10 Firefox 79.0 (64-bit)

Highlighted
Community Veteran
Posts: 7,397
Thanks: 101
Fixes: 2
Registered: ‎30-08-2007

Re: The good old days

WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:

Men Are Just Happier People--
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can never be pregnant.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another petrol station toilet because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks and engines.
A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
Your underwear is £8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You never have strap problems in public
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pen knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
Experience; is something you gain, just after you needed it most.

When faced with two choices, simply toss a coin. It works not because it settles the question for you. But because in that brief moment while the coin is in the air. You suddenly know what you are hoping for.