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Just popping in to say hello

Midnight_Caller
Rising Star
Posts: 4,154
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Registered: ‎15-04-2007

Just popping in to say hello

Hi All

First off I am sorry that this turned into a bit of a rant.

Sorry I haven't been around, as some of you know my partner Angela past away on 28/08/2016 we were together for 34 years, I am still trying to come to terms with losing her, I am still having to see a Bereavement Counselor.

I am mainly on facebook these days with me been the founder of Wheelchair Accessible, one of the reasons why I set up Wheelchair Accessible is because my cousins Graham and Malcolm Angel had Duchenne’s Muscular Dystrophy, sadly both of them have past away, the main reason why I set up Wheelchair Accessible is with my late partner Angela having to use a Wheelchair and finding out that it is murder to get a Taxi that is Wheelchair Accessible.

Plus I run a number of Wheelchair Accessible's sister groups on facebook too!

I have been put on Middlesbrough Community Learning's course by the jobcentre to do English and Maths, to get there in time I have to get up at 07:00 so that I have time to have a coffee after getting washed, and time to wake up in the morning, I must admit I don't like getting up so early.

Oh forgot my stepmam phoned me on 31/01/2019 at 10:43 and let me know that my dad had passed away.

I was surprised to hear from my stepmam.

As I said to mam on the phone as far as I know I was blacklisted by them all, and I said to mam on the phone I am not sorry that my dad passed away may he rot in hell for what he did to me and my muther.

None of my family has phoned or emailed me since 1/9/2016 that was the last time, until my stepmam phoned me.

Thankfully Angela's family has been there for me, Angela's sister helped me with sorting out the funeral arrangements for Angela.

I will try to pop back in from time to time.

If you would like to get in touch with my you can by email via www.dhea.org.uk/contact/

That reminds me I must update the site.

Once more sorry that this turned into a bit of a rant.

11 REPLIES 11
jab1
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Registered: ‎24-02-2012

Re: Just popping in to say hello

@Midnight_Caller Welcome back.Smiley

Glad to see you're still around and seem to be getting your life back.

I won't see you on FB, sorry - I rarely if  ever use 'social media', but that is my choice as I regard it as 'anti-social', although I understand others find it useful.

John
Midnight_Caller
Rising Star
Posts: 4,154
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Registered: ‎15-04-2007

Re: Just popping in to say hello

@jab1,Thank you for the welcome back

Community Veteran
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Registered: ‎11-08-2007

Re: Just popping in to say hello

Hiya  @Midnight_Caller  it's good to see you reaching out, trying to re-establish contact with your old friends here ! Cool smiley

 

I was sorry to see the problems you've been through, and I really appreciate your pain, as I recently lost my two closest family members.  I only came back to this forum a few weeks ago to make a start at social interaction again, after being left very isolated having had to deal alone with the devastating aftermath of losing my loved ones.

 

It's good to see that you're getting help from a bereavement counsellor, how did you go about getting help ?, I'm interested as I wasn't ever offered any support, and have spent almost every day for nearly two years doing my best to complete all the financial and legal documents within the brutal deadlines imposed by HMRC.

 

Your English course is definitely working, in the past you had difficulty with words and clearly expressing what you meant (and those of us that know you understand why), but your posts today are much improved and easy to read. Well done !.

 

I'm glad to see you back, and look forward to reading your future comments and life observations from your interesting and unique perspective.

 

Good luck with your future mate  Thumbs Up

Midnight_Caller
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Posts: 4,154
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Registered: ‎15-04-2007

Re: Just popping in to say hello

@Nibiru, It's funny that you said "trying to re-establish contact with your old friends"

My bereavement counsellor said to me that I should try to mix with more people, that is get some friends.

I am sorry to hear about your loss, as for the bereavement counsellor I was referred to Alliance Psychological Services by my Doctors, with me having a nervous breakdown with the shock of losing the love of my life.

Your Doctors should have a bereavement counselling service that they can refer you to, I hope you get the help that you need.

Oh i was on the waiting list for 1 year.

 

 



Community Veteran
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Registered: ‎11-08-2007

Re: Just popping in to say hello

Thanks for your reply.

 

My doctor won't refer me for anything unless I'm showing signs of being suicidal (which I'm not).

 

Mixing with more people and making new friends is easier said than done !.

In the daytime people are at work, and during the evenings I'm trapped at home looking after my kids.

Living in the middle of nowhere, with no support, I'm still figuring out how to socialise.

Midnight_Caller
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Posts: 4,154
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Registered: ‎15-04-2007

Re: Just popping in to say hello

@Nibiru, You can refer yourself to Alliance Psychological Services www.alliancepsychology.com

Age uk or the CAB may be able to help, they both have a large database of contacts who may be able to help you!

Do you have Ageing Better where you live, if you do they may be able to help you!

Do you have any family that you can pop round and see?

Or do you have any family that you can have a skype call or phone call with?

Hope this helps!

 

Community Veteran
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Registered: ‎11-08-2007

Re: Just popping in to say hello

Another new day, another new start, and happy to be alive. Smiley

Losing loved ones has made me appreciate my own life more, and to take the time to appreciate what I have.

As with every new day, I'm starting with a positive attitude, and have a list of objectives to make my life better than the day before.  Completing lots of little worthwhile achievements is a great way to manage grief, and make incremental improvements towards a new direction for the next stage of my life.

I've already had my morning walk through the local vineyard, which is always a joy when I have views like this -

Vineyard Feb 2019.jpg

Community Veteran
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Registered: ‎02-08-2007

Re: Just popping in to say hello

@Midnight_Caller

Thanks for letting us know how you are getting on.

It's awful to lose someone who is really close to you and things are even more difficult if there are issues with other family members.

Please try and focus on the good times you had with Angela as you will have some happy memories of those times.

It's important to get involved with other things as you are doing and whilst the pain and sorrow will never go away they may ease with the passing of time.

 

Mayfly
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Re: Just popping in to say hello

@Midnight_Caller I'don't know you obviously, but I do know from past posts you have been through some very difficult times. 

 

It's good to see you posting again and may this be the start of a more positive period of your life.

 

Bless you.

 

 

Midnight_Caller
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Posts: 4,154
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Registered: ‎15-04-2007

Re: Just popping in to say hello

@gleneagles & @Mayfly,Thank you both.

I have just got back from School off back out to see the Bereavement Counselor from Alliance Psychological Services later on, then have got to do the Pharmacy Run, that is go from Middlesbrough town centre to Lloyds Pharmacy in the village, what is 1.3 miles from my flat, and yes I live in the town centre what is handy to go to the shops.

Highlighted
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Registered: ‎01-08-2007

Re: Just popping in to say hello

Good to see you back Wink

I need a new signature... i'm bored of the old one!