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Groan

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Registered: 06-04-2007

Groan

Let's have some more bad jokes:
A research group on sea mammals captured a rather odd porpoise on one of its trips. Its peculiarity was that it had feet. After they had photographed and measured the poor thing, they prepared to set it free.
"Wait a minute," said one of the researchers, "Wouldn't it be a kindness if our ship's doctor here were to amputate the feet so that it would be like other porpoises?"
"Not on your life," exclaimed the doctor, "That would be defeeting the porpoise."

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Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear - Mark Twain
He who feared he would not succeed sat still

6 REPLIES
mmorris85
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Registered: 19-12-2012

Re: Groan

That was bad  Tongue
Community Veteran
Posts: 767
Registered: 29-10-2008

Re: Groan

I remember, some years ago, John Humphrys interviewing an Australian on the Today programme, about the repatriation of Aboriginal remains buried in Liverpool. The difficulty with recovering these particular remains was that they would have to dig through a paupers’ grave. John misheard and asked “A porpoise grave? I never knew they buried porpoises?”
You could hear John’s colleagues wheezing like Muttley as he struggled to maintain a respectful tone to the interview.
Gabe
Community Veteran
Posts: 7,912
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Registered: 02-08-2007

Re: Groan

I remember one television interviewer speaking to a chap selling his house and saying your advert in the newspaper is illegal but he said he had every right to word the advert as he thought fit so the interviewer asked him why he didn't like Asians ? Looking puzzled he said he had nothing against Asians so she showed him the advert which read House for Sale, No Asians, it was clearly a misprint as it should have read No Agents ! End of interview Smiley
198kHz
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Posts: 3,217
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Registered: 30-07-2008

Re: Groan

A classified ad in my local rag, which had obviously been taken over the phone, was for the sale of an 'Esselar camera'.  Crazy
Not young enough to know everything
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Posts: 16,538
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Registered: 06-04-2007

Re: Groan

This farmer says to his sheepdog "Go in that field and count my sheep"
After five minutes the dog comes back and says "Well, you have got 40 sheep"
So the farmer says "Don't be stupid,you know I've only got 38!"
"Yeah, but I rounded em' up, didn't I" came the reply

Forum Moderator and Customer
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear - Mark Twain
He who feared he would not succeed sat still

kurusch
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Posts: 2
Registered: 07-02-2013

Re: Groan

An Indian man was walking past a fresh fish shop when a large model of a prawn dropped on him and killed him.  The headline in the next days local paper was: 'Crustacean crushed Asian.'