cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

A close shave

TORPC
Grafter
Posts: 5,163
Registered: 08-12-2013

A close shave

The Barber

A Guy stuck his head into a barbershop and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut?
The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, 'About 2 hours.'
The guy left.
A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut?'
The barber looked around at the shop and said, 'About 3 hours.'
The guy left.
A week later, the same guy stuck his head in the shop and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut?'
The barber looked around the shop and said, 'About an hour and a half' .
The guy left.
The barber turned to his friend and said, 'Hey, Bob, do me a favour , follow him and see where he goes. He keeps asking how long he has to wait for a haircut, but he never comes back.'
A little while later, Bob returned to the shop, laughing hysterically.
The barber asked, 'So, where does he go when he leaves?'
Bob looked up, wiped the tears from his eyes and said....
'Your house
----------------------------------
8 REPLIES
Community Veteran
Posts: 1,770
Thanks: 33
Fixes: 1
Registered: 08-10-2010

Re: A close shave

Grin Grin Grin
True story..... A friend of mine owned a hairdressers in Ipswich. One day 2 pilots came in from the local airfield for a  trim. He duly gave them a trim and, offering a hairspray, said to one " Do you want anything on it sir?"
"No thanks, one smell of that and my wife will think I've been to a brothel".
The other one said "Stick plenty on mine - my wife doesn't know what a brothel smells like"  Smiley Smiley
Community Veteran
Posts: 5,346
Thanks: 609
Registered: 23-09-2010

Re: A close shave

I remember the old school barbers of my youth. Three chairs, three middle aged barbers, three tubs of Brylcreem, and a crowded room no women.
My Dad's brother used to be a barber on the Queens. Not the best of jobs in those days as it was dangerous in a way.
He died in his mid twenties from what was really a work related disease, TB.
Community Veteran
Posts: 7,928
Thanks: 603
Fixes: 8
Registered: 02-08-2007

Re: A close shave

School boy's joke,
Chap goes into a barber and asks the price of a haircut.
Barber: £  10
Chap : What's the price of a shave ?
Barber: £ 6
Chap : Shave my head.
NB on a more serious note is it possible to cut your own hair and do a good job.?
Community Veteran
Posts: 4,778
Thanks: 1,056
Fixes: 27
Registered: 16-10-2014

Re: A close shave

Quote from: gleneagles
NB on a more serious note is it possible to cut your own hair and do a good job.?

Yes, I can easily clip the two or three strands I have left and to be fair to myself always looks good.  Tongue
--
Mook
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 16,569
Thanks: 1,802
Fixes: 125
Registered: 06-04-2007

Re: A close shave

Quote from: gleneagles
NB on a more serious note is it possible to cut your own hair and do a good job.?
SWMBO does and, I must say, she does a good job.
Really, I MUST SAY Wink

Forum Moderator and Customer
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear - Mark Twain
He who feared he would not succeed sat still

Community Veteran
Posts: 5,346
Thanks: 609
Registered: 23-09-2010

Re: A close shave

Quote from: gleneagles
NB on a more serious note is it possible to cut your own hair and do a good job.?

I've cut my own for over a decade.
At least then you get the exact cut you want and not what the barber thinks you want.
Community Veteran
Posts: 7,928
Thanks: 603
Fixes: 8
Registered: 02-08-2007

Re: A close shave

Well there are gadgets that you can run over your hair that give you a number 2 cut but assuming you do not want a crew cut and you have a good head of hair can you still cut your own hair ?
TORPC
Grafter
Posts: 5,163
Registered: 08-12-2013

Re: A close shave

@bilnotben
Plus you save yourself a fortune, as my barbers has put their prices up from £5.50 - £9.00 for a simple NO:- 2 haircut, that takes less than 5 minutes to complete & go to the counter get out your wallet & pay
Then they look @ you to say (where's my tip) as they reluctantly hand over your change & I said you need lower your prices as they are way to high & went on my merry way
@gleneagles
I am thinking of purchasing one of those gadgets you mention & get SWMBO to cut my hair