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Southern Edition of Microsoft Windows


Southern Edition of Microsoft Windows

Dear Consumers:

It has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS 2005 Southern ! EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside of the south.

If you have one of these, you may need help understanding the commands. The Southern EDITION may be recognized by the unique opening screen. It reads: WINDERS 2005, with a background picture of Waylon and Willie superimposed on a bottle of Jack Daniels.

Please also note:
The Recycle Bin is labeled "Outhouse"
My Computer is called "This Dern Contraption"
Dial Up Networking is called "Good Ol' Boys"
Control Panel is known as "The Dashboard"
Hard Drive is referred to as "4-Wheel Drive"
Floppies are "Them little ol' plastic thangs"
Instead of an error message, "Duct Tape" pops up.

Reset..............try'er agin
Find...............hunt fer it
Go to............over yonder
Back...............back yonder
Help..............hep me out here
Stop...............kwitit (WHOA!)
Start............crank'er up
Programs......... stuff at duz stuff
Documents....... .stuff ah done did

Also note that the Southern EDITION does not recognize capital letters or punctuation marks. Some programs that are exclusive to WINDERS 2005:

Tiperiter............a word processing program
Colerin' Book.................a graphics program
Cyferin' Mersheen...........calculator
Outhouse Paper................notepad
Inner-net.....................Microsoft explorer 5.0
Pitchers .a graphics viewer

We regret any inconvenience it may have caused. If you received a copy of the Southern EDITION, you may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.

I hope this helps all y'all!
Community Veteran
Posts: 1,656
Registered: 13-06-2007

Southern Edition of Microsoft Windows

there is something pretty much identical called the glasgow edition of windows!

Click here to see it (if your easliy offended by swearing I don't advise you to click!)

Southern Edition of Microsoft Windows

Rather much like this one hey Wink

Geordie windows 2000

Word of warning, there are more than an average amount of swear words. Dont look if you cant bear to read the words boo let alone swearing!!!

But on the whole, enjoy :p


Gordon Strachan - Genius

Y'all may have see this one - Gordons a comedy genius.

Southampton manager Gordon Strachan on Wayne Rooney
Its an incredible rise to stardom. At 17 you're more likely to get a
call from Michael Jackson than Sven Goran Eriksson.

Reporter: Gordon, Do you think James Beattie deserves to be in the
England squad?
Strachan: I dont care, I'm Scottish

Reporter: "Gordon, can we have a quick word please?"
Strachan: "Velocity" [walks off]

Reporter: Welcome to Southampton Football Club. Do you think you are
the right man to turn things around?
Strachan: No. I was asked if I thought I was the right man for the job
and I said, "No, I think they should have got George Graham because
I'm useless."

Reporter: Is that your best start to a season?
Strachan: Well I've still got a job so it's far better than the
Coventry one, that's for sure.

Reporter: Are you getting where you want to be with this team?
Strachan: We're not doing bad. What do you expect us to be like? We
were eighth in the league last year, in the cup final and we got into
Europe. I don't know where you expect me to get to. Do you expect us
to win the Champions League?

Reporter: Gordon, you must be delighted with that result?
Strachan: You're spot on! You can read me like a book.

Strachan: I've got more important things to think about. I've got a
yogurt to finish by today, the expiry date is today.

Reporter: This might sound like a daft question, but you'll be happy
to get your first win under your belt, won't you?
Strachan: You're right. It is a daft question. I'm not even going to
bother answering that one. It is a daft question, you're spot on there.

Reporter: Bang, there goes your unbeaten run. Can you take it?
Strachan: No, I'm just going to crumble like a wreck. I'll go home,
become an alcoholic and maybe! jump of a bridge. Umm, I think I can
take it, yeah.

Reporter: There's no negative vibes or negative feelings here?
Strachan: Apart from yourself, we're all quite positive round here.
I'm going to whack you over the head with a big stick, down negative man,

Reporter: where will Marion Pahars fit into the team line-up?
Strachan: Not telling you! It's a secret. >

Reporter: You don't take losing lightly, do you Gordon?
Strachan: I don't take stupid comments lightly either.

Reporter: So, Gordon, in what areas do you think Middlesbrough were
better than you today?
Strachan: What areas? Mainly that big green one out there....

Southern Edition of Microsoft Windows

Gordon Strachan - what a complete and utter c u next tuesday - Evil

Along with Craig bellend and Nicky Summerbee.

They are the most hated people by any Coventry supporter.